First, let's start with musical updates.
The cabaret is still scheduled for February 9th, and auditions for the school musical, "My Son Pinocchio" are on January 28th. Everyone, including mr. Rao (the theatre teacher and director of it all) said I would make a great Pinocchio, so he gave m the aside for Stromboli which he gave every guy who is auditioning, along with an aside for Pinocchio.
Midterm exams were supposed to start today, but we got a snow day! No exams until Monday!
In other news I got my eyes checked yesterday, and it turns out I'm near-sighted, so I'm getting glasses. I actually can't wait and I'm oddly excited.
Today has been a pretty lazy day and I've been lying down with Bailey for most of it, while pebbles and Furby (Nan's baby) have been out in the living room lying down or playing.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Sorry I haven't been around
But here is why...
I hate 2011… Dad died on october 9th due to cancer, Uncle Bob died exactly a week later also due to cancer… I’m still dealing with the tail end of 2011 though because just when I thought all the devestating events were over, the last thing I ever would have expected happened.
Out of nowhere, nan died on December 29th. She was my best friend and I was so close to her, and also, she helped me so much with dad’s death and honestly she wasn’t sick or anything, she was so lively and fun, and we all thought she was going to live to be 90 or so (she was 76) and I just can’t believe it. It was so sudden.
Like I said, she wasn’t sick or anything and she was her happy, fun self. One minute she is upstairs with us having a laugh with me, mom, and some 2 of her and mom’s friends.
Then she said she was going downstairs (she lived in our basement appartment) with her baby, her little puppy we gave her in early november for Christmas who she loved unconditionally. Mom asked if she would be up to watch Cornation Street later and she said that she probably would be, so she went downstairs and moms friends left.
20 minutes later mom realized that cornation street was going to be on in 15-20 minutes, so she called downstair to see if nan was coming up and my uncle Terry who is home for christmas answered the phone and said she was in the bathroom. Then, 5 minutes later, Mom heard Terry calling out from downstairs that nan was passed out on the bathroom floor.
Mom started doing CPR on her while Terry called the paramedics and then the rest of their siblings and my brother texted me to “get home NOW” which caused my heart to sink because the last time a text like that was sent, it was to my brother when dad had the stroke (exactly 1 week before he died).
Anyway long story short, the only thing it could have been was a (very sudden) massive heart attack.
I honestly can’t believe it and it just doesn’t feel real.
I’ve spent all day at her wake and am going back in about half an hour. Then again tomorrow and her funeral is Wednesday.
I haven’t even gone over to her casquette yet and I’ve already bawled my eyes out AGAIN. This is just too much. Dad and nan were 2 of the most important people in my life and honestly, since dad has been gone these few months, nan was the main one keeping us sane (mainly mom because whenever she needed to vent or rant about me and my brother, that’s where she went) and now we’re all screwed…
Anyway it is really going to hit me tomorrow because Tuesday was always our day. I would always randomly drop down as well, and we would always randomly hang out and stuff, but ever Tuesday night at 9:30, I was down to nans with her, on her bed to watch glee (or whatever else was on if that wasn’t). My aunt said that nan said that was her favorite part of the day. She also said she couldn’t be happier because she got the puppy she wanted and that even at 17 I still loved spending time with her and our relationship hasn’t changed and that she was really lucky.
She often told me I was her favourite grandchild which she never needed to because I knew it anyway because she really showed it, but I loved her so much and she loved me so much…
This isn’t supposed to be about our relationship and stuff, it’s just supposed to be letting you know what happened incase anyone is wondering, so I will stop now.
I hate 2011… Dad died on october 9th due to cancer, Uncle Bob died exactly a week later also due to cancer… I’m still dealing with the tail end of 2011 though because just when I thought all the devestating events were over, the last thing I ever would have expected happened.
Out of nowhere, nan died on December 29th. She was my best friend and I was so close to her, and also, she helped me so much with dad’s death and honestly she wasn’t sick or anything, she was so lively and fun, and we all thought she was going to live to be 90 or so (she was 76) and I just can’t believe it. It was so sudden.
Like I said, she wasn’t sick or anything and she was her happy, fun self. One minute she is upstairs with us having a laugh with me, mom, and some 2 of her and mom’s friends.
Then she said she was going downstairs (she lived in our basement appartment) with her baby, her little puppy we gave her in early november for Christmas who she loved unconditionally. Mom asked if she would be up to watch Cornation Street later and she said that she probably would be, so she went downstairs and moms friends left.
20 minutes later mom realized that cornation street was going to be on in 15-20 minutes, so she called downstair to see if nan was coming up and my uncle Terry who is home for christmas answered the phone and said she was in the bathroom. Then, 5 minutes later, Mom heard Terry calling out from downstairs that nan was passed out on the bathroom floor.
Mom started doing CPR on her while Terry called the paramedics and then the rest of their siblings and my brother texted me to “get home NOW” which caused my heart to sink because the last time a text like that was sent, it was to my brother when dad had the stroke (exactly 1 week before he died).
Anyway long story short, the only thing it could have been was a (very sudden) massive heart attack.
I honestly can’t believe it and it just doesn’t feel real.
I’ve spent all day at her wake and am going back in about half an hour. Then again tomorrow and her funeral is Wednesday.
I haven’t even gone over to her casquette yet and I’ve already bawled my eyes out AGAIN. This is just too much. Dad and nan were 2 of the most important people in my life and honestly, since dad has been gone these few months, nan was the main one keeping us sane (mainly mom because whenever she needed to vent or rant about me and my brother, that’s where she went) and now we’re all screwed…
Anyway it is really going to hit me tomorrow because Tuesday was always our day. I would always randomly drop down as well, and we would always randomly hang out and stuff, but ever Tuesday night at 9:30, I was down to nans with her, on her bed to watch glee (or whatever else was on if that wasn’t). My aunt said that nan said that was her favorite part of the day. She also said she couldn’t be happier because she got the puppy she wanted and that even at 17 I still loved spending time with her and our relationship hasn’t changed and that she was really lucky.
She often told me I was her favourite grandchild which she never needed to because I knew it anyway because she really showed it, but I loved her so much and she loved me so much…
This isn’t supposed to be about our relationship and stuff, it’s just supposed to be letting you know what happened incase anyone is wondering, so I will stop now.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
2nd last day before Christmas!
Sorry that this is the first post I've made in ages!
Today was interesting because there wasn't much going on since it's the second last day of school before hilidays, so most people were either setting up for the big variety show tomorrow, or just not going to school/class.
In Histoire Mondiale first period, 8 of us showed up and Ms asked (in french) if we wanted to do work and look at the next thing we had to do... or go to Tim Hortons, so naturally we went to Tim Hortons! :D It was so much fun!
Art was fun as always and then I had musical theatre and I stayed in the art room haha.
At Lunch myself and Bianca went up to grab lunch from sobeys, brought it back and went to the A/V room to watch Big Bang Theory.
For English, Mrs Carter, Ms. Heneghan's number one choice substitute AND best friend was in for her and I had to pass in an essay... A personal essay. It was about someone who was a key person in your life... I chose dad. She said it was absolutely beautiful and it ended up being just us talking about life the whole period which all stemmed from that essay and how beutiful she thought it was.
I may post that here actually.
Last period, I chilled with Ms. Carter again, but this time Zach, Tristen and Alex joined us. She had more people in her room hanging out with her during her free period than she did when she had a class aha.
So it was quite a good day!
Today was interesting because there wasn't much going on since it's the second last day of school before hilidays, so most people were either setting up for the big variety show tomorrow, or just not going to school/class.
In Histoire Mondiale first period, 8 of us showed up and Ms asked (in french) if we wanted to do work and look at the next thing we had to do... or go to Tim Hortons, so naturally we went to Tim Hortons! :D It was so much fun!
Art was fun as always and then I had musical theatre and I stayed in the art room haha.
At Lunch myself and Bianca went up to grab lunch from sobeys, brought it back and went to the A/V room to watch Big Bang Theory.
For English, Mrs Carter, Ms. Heneghan's number one choice substitute AND best friend was in for her and I had to pass in an essay... A personal essay. It was about someone who was a key person in your life... I chose dad. She said it was absolutely beautiful and it ended up being just us talking about life the whole period which all stemmed from that essay and how beutiful she thought it was.
I may post that here actually.
Last period, I chilled with Ms. Carter again, but this time Zach, Tristen and Alex joined us. She had more people in her room hanging out with her during her free period than she did when she had a class aha.
So it was quite a good day!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Melvin- School Doodles
I was doodling today in school (like always) and I started making a bunch of doodles of my character, Melvin.
Here they are!
Favorite Expressions
Here is something interesting I stumbled into while doodling... These next two expressions go really well together. This would be the first.
Which turns into this :)
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
October 2011
October 2011 has been and will always be known as the hardest month of my life.
You already know, that I have lost my father due to cancer (on the 9th) and I have lost my uncle, also due to cancer exactly one week later (on the 16th). Needless to say, I am still having a tough time wth it, and I always will... However something else happened as well which I have yet to write about.
On Friday, the 28th, Matty Johnson, a student at my school in grade 12, 17 years old same age as me, died. I was friends with him to an extent. in school we wre friends... Especially last year, in drama... He was always a happy, fun kind of persn, and he brightened everyones day, and because of that, pretty much everyone that knew him, liked him... hich brings me to the one thing no one can understand because it is impossible to understand and there just is no answer (so we must stop trying to find one because we won't), it was suicide.
Before anyone asks, as I ave already established, no he was not gay and no he was not bullied or picked on at all. Actually it was quite the opposite: he was loved by all.
There have been councilers available for those who need them... and many, many students and teachers have been deeply effected by this, even one's who didn't know him because chances are they knew of him... so the hurt is school wide. Ms. Moyse, my math teacher loved Matty and se lost a boy for whom she truly cared deeply. She has always been there for me since day 1, she is a strong woman, who wears her heart on her sleeve. She talked to the class today and all, and well I can't go into any farter detail than that...
Ms. Heneghan, my english teacher has also been there for me from day 1, and is always checking on me and I thank god I havepeople like her and Ms. Moyse in my life. I know for a fact that she really does mean it when she says I can go to her if I need ANYTHING... she said the same thing to everyone in class today. One thing she said was that we should go to her, a guidence counciler, anyone (because it's important to open up and talk about whatever we may be feeling) and tell them "I need...". She continued to say "'I need...' Actually just that, just 'I need'. You won't even have to finish it because that in itself is a sentence that speaks greatly and you can then tal to them and they will help you find the eding to it".
Ms Heneghan then gave us a topic about which we will be writing on Thursday which is when e have our next English class. She based the idea on a quote which is "where words fail, music speaks". She continued to say that obviousy he meant music without words, but it applies to those with words as well, so we will e writing about one of our favorite sons and how we relate to the lyrics. It is a great oppurtunity to open up. "This is a PERSONAL reflection. I'm not testing you, there is no 'right' answer. You ca be as open as you want or as closed as you want. These will be read with great respect and understanding", and she continued to say how we were all bave etc. I noticed she kept looking at me who had eyes that were slightly brimmed with tears, we kept making eye contact, especially when she mentioned about how it must be really hard for sme of us because "some of you have already had your own losses other than this and have had them recently".
Ms. Starks, the art teacher and Ms. Gillis, my homeroom teacer have also been therefor me from day 1 the same way. I am so grateful to have amazing people like them.
*************************************************************************************
I will end this by saying R.I.P Matty. You will always be loved and missed by many, rest easy.
You already know, that I have lost my father due to cancer (on the 9th) and I have lost my uncle, also due to cancer exactly one week later (on the 16th). Needless to say, I am still having a tough time wth it, and I always will... However something else happened as well which I have yet to write about.
On Friday, the 28th, Matty Johnson, a student at my school in grade 12, 17 years old same age as me, died. I was friends with him to an extent. in school we wre friends... Especially last year, in drama... He was always a happy, fun kind of persn, and he brightened everyones day, and because of that, pretty much everyone that knew him, liked him... hich brings me to the one thing no one can understand because it is impossible to understand and there just is no answer (so we must stop trying to find one because we won't), it was suicide.
Before anyone asks, as I ave already established, no he was not gay and no he was not bullied or picked on at all. Actually it was quite the opposite: he was loved by all.
There have been councilers available for those who need them... and many, many students and teachers have been deeply effected by this, even one's who didn't know him because chances are they knew of him... so the hurt is school wide. Ms. Moyse, my math teacher loved Matty and se lost a boy for whom she truly cared deeply. She has always been there for me since day 1, she is a strong woman, who wears her heart on her sleeve. She talked to the class today and all, and well I can't go into any farter detail than that...
Ms. Heneghan, my english teacher has also been there for me from day 1, and is always checking on me and I thank god I havepeople like her and Ms. Moyse in my life. I know for a fact that she really does mean it when she says I can go to her if I need ANYTHING... she said the same thing to everyone in class today. One thing she said was that we should go to her, a guidence counciler, anyone (because it's important to open up and talk about whatever we may be feeling) and tell them "I need...". She continued to say "'I need...' Actually just that, just 'I need'. You won't even have to finish it because that in itself is a sentence that speaks greatly and you can then tal to them and they will help you find the eding to it".
Ms Heneghan then gave us a topic about which we will be writing on Thursday which is when e have our next English class. She based the idea on a quote which is "where words fail, music speaks". She continued to say that obviousy he meant music without words, but it applies to those with words as well, so we will e writing about one of our favorite sons and how we relate to the lyrics. It is a great oppurtunity to open up. "This is a PERSONAL reflection. I'm not testing you, there is no 'right' answer. You ca be as open as you want or as closed as you want. These will be read with great respect and understanding", and she continued to say how we were all bave etc. I noticed she kept looking at me who had eyes that were slightly brimmed with tears, we kept making eye contact, especially when she mentioned about how it must be really hard for sme of us because "some of you have already had your own losses other than this and have had them recently".
Ms. Starks, the art teacher and Ms. Gillis, my homeroom teacer have also been therefor me from day 1 the same way. I am so grateful to have amazing people like them.
*************************************************************************************
I will end this by saying R.I.P Matty. You will always be loved and missed by many, rest easy.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Born As An Artist... Born With A Pencil In My Hand
"You are a born artist" and "You are a born cartoonist" are things I have heard a lot and really they are right when they say it is something with which you are born. There is a certain, natural love, pasion and creativity that cannot be learned...
People in the family and their friends all make jokes about how I was practically born with a pencil in my hand and both mom and dad have even said "I don't think I can remember a time when you did't have a pencil in your hand" and "I don't think there ever was one".
When going through old pictures, looking for pictures of dad (there are tons) my mom found this picture, laughed and said once again, "Like I said... I can't remember a time when you didn't hae a pencil in your hand".
I am probably about 2 years old or so, with a pencil in my hand...and yes, that is a drawig book in my lap.
****************************************
People in the family and their friends all make jokes about how I was practically born with a pencil in my hand and both mom and dad have even said "I don't think I can remember a time when you did't have a pencil in your hand" and "I don't think there ever was one".
When going through old pictures, looking for pictures of dad (there are tons) my mom found this picture, laughed and said once again, "Like I said... I can't remember a time when you didn't hae a pencil in your hand".
I am probably about 2 years old or so, with a pencil in my hand...and yes, that is a drawig book in my lap.
****************************************
If you haven't guessed already, I love nastalgia and nastalgic things... especially about my childhood, and mom and dad always have as well... the next post (or a post in the near future) will shed more light on that.
Monday, October 17, 2011
Bob...
Dad's wake was on wednesday and thursday and the funeral was Friday. I cried so much, it was the most emotional time I have ever experienced and am still experienceing. I bawled my eyes dry and it hasn't even hit me.
A LOT went on inbetween that time but I don't have time to write about any of it...
We had an Irish wake back at the house (in honor of dad) so almost everyone at the funral came over for a few drinks an a bit of a big ol' party. Dad was a huge party person, so it's what he would have wanted.
A LOT went on inbetween that time but I don't have time to write about any of it...
We had an Irish wake back at the house (in honor of dad) so almost everyone at the funral came over for a few drinks an a bit of a big ol' party. Dad was a huge party person, so it's what he would have wanted.
*********************************
R. I. P Uncle Bob
Marg i dad's sister, and her husband Bob (uncle Bob) has been battling caner for 6 years and he was put in Paliative care before Dad passed. He and dad were really close, so when he heard about dad, he got really really upst and he was especially upset that he couldn't make it out for the wake. Bob passed Sunday, just one week after Dad... One thing is for sure; I will never forget October 2011...
We say, and honestly beliee that Bob just anted to be with dad, and now he is. We have even made a few jokes about how dad would greet him "Hey, Bob! I wasn't expecting you, so soon, but I've got a bit a lambs (rum) on the go, and I've got one waiting for ya", and how they will have their few drinks and a good time like they always did.
On quick last note: Ms. Starkes, the art teacher who is moreof a close friend and metnor to me than a teachr, stopped by the funeral home with Ms. Gillis, my homeroom teacher. My math teacher stopped by as well which was really sweet, and also, my beloved English teacher who is also more like a friend than just a teacher, Ms. Heneghan dropped by as well, so I know I will have evryone's help and support when I finally go back to school.
That's it for now...
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